The Police Jokes

1) Act out the situations:

A. The sheriff of a small town was also the town's animal Vet. One night the phone rang, and his wife answered. A sharp voice shouted: "Is your husband there?" "Do you require his services as a sheriff or as a vet?" the wife asked. "Both!" was the reply. "We can't get our dog's mouth open, and there's a burglar in it."

B. An elementary school class goes on a trip to the police station. The Officer points to the 10 MOST WANTED list and tells them that these are the most wanted fugitives in the USA. Little Boy says pointing to one of the photos " He is the MOST WANTED in the USA?!" Officer says "Yes." Little Boy asks "Why didn't you keep him when you were taking his picture?”.

2) Read the anecdote. Describe the driver’s behaviour. Predict the end of the story.

A police officer stops a guy over for speeding (перевищення швидкості) .

Officer: May I see your driver's license?
Driver: I don't have one. I had it suspended when I got my 5th DUI (керування транспортним засобом у нетверезому стані).
Officer: May I see the owner's card for this vehicle?
Driver: It's not my car. I stole it.
Officer: The car is stolen?
Driver: That's right. But I think I saw the owner's card in the glove box when I was putting my gun in there.
Officer: There's a gun in the glove box?
Driver: Yes, sir. That's where I put it after I shot and killed the woman who owns this car and stuffed her in the trunk.

Officer: There's a BODY in the TRUNK?!?!?
Driver: Yes, sir.