Identifying signs of stress in your children and teens

Young people experience stress from a variety of sources. Some stress can be positive, but too much stress is overwhelming. Tuning into emotional or behavioral cues is important in identifying potential problems.

Young people, like adults, experience stress. It can come from a variety of sources including doing well in school, making and sustaining friendships, or managing perceived expectations from their parents, teachers or coaches. Some stress can be positive in that it provides the energy to tackle a big test, presentation or sports event. Too much stress, however, can create unnecessary hardship and challenge. Adults can sometimes be unaware when their children or teens are experiencing overwhelming feelings of stress.

Here are some tips from the American Psychological Association on ways to recognize possible signs of stress:

- Watch for negative changes in behavior

Youth of all ages, but especially younger children, may find it difficult to recognize and verbalize when they are experiencing stress. Stress can manifest itself through changes in behavior.

- Understand that “feeling sick” may be caused by stress

Stress can also appear in physical symptoms such as stomachaches and headaches.

- Be aware of how your child or teen interacts with others

It is important for parents to network with one another so that they can come to know how a child or a teen is doing in the world around them. In addition to this fact communicating with other parents, being in contact with teachers, school administrators and leaders of extracurricular activities can help parents tap into their child or teen’s thoughts, feelings and behaviors, and be aware of any sources of concern.

- Listen and translate

Children and teens may also express feelings of stress by saying negative things about themselves, others, or the world around them (e.g. “No one likes me,” “I’m stupid,” “Nothing is fun.”). It is important for parents to listen for these words and statements and try to figure out why your child or teen is saying them and whether they seem to indicate a source or sources of stress.

- Seek support

Parents, children and teens do not need to tackle overwhelming stress on their own. Parents must ask for help to psychologists. Psychologists have special training to help people identify problems and develop effective strategies to resolve overwhelming feelings of stress.