Body talk

In a crowded cafe in Mexico researches watched two people deep in conversation. As they made points during their talk they reached out and touched each other - on the hand, the arm, the shoulder. In fact, in one hour 180 such person-to-person contacts were made. And when the researches watched to Parisians chatting away 120 touching contacts were made.

But when they repeated their experiment in London it was found that the cafe conversationalists stubbornly refused to touch each other once during the whole hour.

It all went to confirm scientifically what people have known for a long time: that there are enormous variations between different races and different nationalities in the way that they use gestures and other body movements to augment and emphasize what they are saying.

Yet even though the British (and the Americans, Japanese and Scandinavians, too) seem very reserved in this respect, recent research has shown that each and everyone of us indulges in an extraordinary variety of tiny unconscious gestures - like almost imperceptible nods of the head, movement of our eyebrows and the eyes themselves - every time we meet someone or carry on a conversation with them.

In fact, these subconscious gestures «say» as much, if not more, about ourselves as the words we use. And this body language regulates conversation: with it we signal when we wish to speak or when we think it is someone else’s turn. It also reveals how we feel about whom we are talking to - whether we feel superior or inferior, friendly or hostile, interested or bored.

In the last several years scientists have been discovering fascinating details about this silent ‘body language’ and the role it plays in our lives. As one researcher says,»We speak with our vocal chords, but we communicate with our whole bodies».

There are two main ways in which this body language communication is carried on: through movement of the head and the use of facial expressions made by the eyes and mouth, and through ‘posture’ – how and where we stand and sit when we meet or converse with others.

When two people talk to each other, they need some sort of cue to tell them when to speak and when to listen. As one British researcher into this subject, Dr. Michael Argyle of Oxford University, says: «When people first meet it is unlikely that their spontaneous styles of speaking will fit together and there is a period during which adjustments are made - one person has to speak less, another has to speak faster and so on. This is all managed by a simple system of nonverbal signaling, the main cues being nods, grunts and shifts of gaze».

The head nod is the most basic of these signals. When we are listening to someone we give tiny nods of the head in rhythm with his words. These nods show that we are listening, that we are involved with what he is saying. They give him permission, as it were, to carry on talking. But when we want to say something, our nods become much more rapid, breaking up the rhythm of his speech, showing that we want to break in. All conversationalists (even when they talk on the telephone) indulge in what Dr. Argyle has called this «gestural dance.» But while head nods are important in regulating two-way conversations, it is the eyes which add so much more to this nonverbal communication.

American psychologist Dr. Julius Fast has made a special study of body language. He says, «Of all the parts of the human body that are used to transmit information, the eyes are the most important and can transmit the most subtle nuances.»

However, when we are meeting someone or talking to them we spend most of our time not looking at them but looking away. The reason? Simply, it is rude to stare, because staring is an invasion of the other person’s privacy. It is reserved for examining objects rather than people. Dr. Fast says: «With unfamiliar human beings, we must avoid staring at them and yet we must also avoid ignoring them. To make them into people rather than objects, we use a deliberate and polite inattention. We look at them long enough to make it quite clear that we see them, and then we immediately look away. We are saying in body language, ‘I know you are there’ and a moment later we add ‘but I would not dream of intruding on your privacy.’»

Of course, different societies and cultures have slightly different rules about eye contact. That is why we sometimes feel uncomfortable at being «stared at» by men from, say, the Arab world, where eye contact is normally a little longer than we used to. And the rules of such behavior are not inborn: children have to learn them by experience. That is why young children often seem to stare at strangers who interest them. They are not being impolite; they just have not mastered the social techniques of body language.

We use our eyes to regulate conversation, too. Just before we begin to speak we look away from the listener - and just before we are going to stop, we give him a longish gaze, to indicate «It’s your turn now.» But even when we know people really well, we actually gaze very little into their eyes while talking to them.

Another researcher investigated how often people being interviewed looked at the interviewer. He found that the man who made the most eye contact still looked away 27 percent of the time - and the man who looked away the most had his eyes elsewhere 92 percent of the time. And half the people looked away for half of the time. The experts conclude that looking while listening indicates attentiveness and interest; while speaking, it is a measure of sincerity. We all recognize this, subconsciously, to be true. We call a rogue «shifty» because he shifts his eyes. And salesmen of all sorts (including politicians who want to «sell» their own policies) have long used the «sincerity signal» of good eye contact to help put their message across.

One of the most fascinating recently discovered signals of body language is the «eyebrow flash». In it both eyebrows are raised to their maximum extent for about one-sixth of a second. The eyebrow flash was first reported to a meeting of body language experts at the Royal Society in London a few years ago. They were amazed. One of them reported:»Suddenly the members of the conference were made conscious of a gesture which they had been using many times a day without realizing it. From that moment on it became impossible to greet a colleague without a momentary mutual embarrassment as each realized he had used this commonplace gesture without meaning to». The man who discovered the eyebrow flash was Dr. Eibl-Eibesfeldt of the Max Planck Institute in Germany. He has filmed its use all over the world, and he found surprising variations between different cultures. He told the Royal Society conference:»In central Europe, the eyebrow flash is used as a greeting to good friends and relatives, but if people are reserved, they do not use it».

In some cultures, however, the eyebrow flash is suppressed: in Japan it is considered an indecent gesture. But Europeans use it frequently, particularly «during flirting, when strongly approving, when thanking and during discussions - for example, when emphasizing a statement and thus calling for attention». Dr. Eibl-Eibesfeldt added: «We are not normally aware that we use this signal but we respond strongly to it in greeting situations. We smile back and give an eyebrow flash. However, if we are not familiar with the person, we experience embarrassment».

Because there are wide cultural variations in this silent eye and eyebrow language, difficulties can arise. An American businessman, for example, might feel he was getting on very well with a Japanese with whom he wanted to do business - and quite unconsciously begin regularly to use the eyebrow flash. But although he feels everything is going splendidly, he does not get the contract. The reason: the more reserved Japanese has been embarrassed by these, to him, «indecent» gestures. Similarly, in some Mediterranean and Latin American cultures it is the custom for children to show respect and obedience by not meeting the eyes of an adult. So when they are accused of being naughty they will look down or away, even if they are innocent. In Western Europe, children will show their sincerity with a clear-eyed gaze. There have been cases where Mediterranean or Latin American children have been punished at school «because they looked so guilty». But in refusing to meet the teacher’s eye they were only showing their respect.

There are problems about eye contact in sexual encounters too. It is curious that the Latin races, who are much freer in body movement and gesture than those in Western Europe, reserve prolonged eye contact for only the most intimate situations. These days it is quite permissible foe English girls to look at men for relatively long periods without the signal being taken as «I’m available and amenable to further advances». But an even slightly prolonged glance in, say, Italy might be taken as a «come on». So perhaps the Italians’ reputation for making unwanted advances to English girls is not entirely their fault.

There are dozens more ways in which we use our eyes, eyelids and eyebrows to enhance conversation. Knitting the brows or winking are obvious examples. But for really strong signals about our true emotions, we use our mouths.

We can «lie» to people with words about our true feelings, we can even learn to «lie» with our eyes by, for example, consciously emphasizing the «sincerity signal» of eye contact. But it is much more difficult to lie with our mouths. We can pretend to be enjoying ourselves by smiling, but it is very difficult to keep it up - and often the type of smile we produce will give away what we are really thinking.

For researchers have shown that there are many different types of smile, which come through in different situations. The leading expert in this field is Dr. Grant of London’s Chelsea College of Sciences and Technology. He says, «The lips are frequently used to express emotions and it is very difficult to disguise them».

One of the reasons why we are so expressive with our lips is the way that man has evolved. Many mammals have long facial whiskers which need muscles to control them. Although man does not have these whiskers he still has the residual remains of the muscles, which gives him such precise control over his lips. There are hundreds of different smiles, but Dr. Grant has found that they can be grouped into five main categories.

First comes the «upper smile», so called because the lips are only slightly open, uncovering only the upper teeth. Dr. Grant describes it as the «how do you do?» smile since it is seen briefly when people meet and shake hands. This smile is also seen for longer periods in less formal situations - such as when children coming out of school rush to see their mother or when a wife welcomes her husband home from work.

We do not smile just when we are with other people. If we feel contented or happy on our own we will often smile to ourselves. When we do, we are most likely to use the «simple smile», the «I’m happy by myself» smile. Here, while the corners of the mouth are turned upwards, the lips remain firmly together and none of the teeth is exposed during the smile.

When we are expressing deep joy or excitement, especially in a crowd at, say, a baseball game where others are reacting in the same way, we use the «broad smile». The mouth opens very wide, the lips are curled right back exposing both upper and lower teeth. This is the really uninhibited smile of sheer pleasure. It can be seen at its best in children unselfconsciously enjoying themselves in play.

One of the five groups of smiles is almost exclusively reserved for women and girls, because it conveys a feeling of subordination. Called the «lip-in smile» it is similar to the upper smile except that the lower lip is drawn in between the teeth. It is often accompanied by a slight cocking of the head to one side, and a shy, upward glance. This is the coy smile of young girls and children, an expression of subservience and innocence.

The last smile is the one no one really wants to see. It occurs when the smiler wants to pretend that he (or she) is enjoying himself but really is not. They try to smile naturally but produce the «oblong grin». The lips are drawn right back all right, but instead of the mouth being happily open, the teeth are clenched. Dr. Grand says it is the sort of smile you can see on a secretary’s face if the boss is chasing her around the office. Or you may see it in a wife when her husband asks her if she is enjoying watching the football on television.

As well as expressing approval or enjoyment the lips can be used to signal the opposite emotions. If we disapprove of something or someone strongly, we set our lips in a hard, thin line. When we are sad, we turn down the edges of our mouths. When we feel frustrated or we cannot get our own way, our lips begin to form into a pout.

It must be emphasized that all these facial gestures are usually done entirely unconsciously. They are true reflections of our inner feelings. We may be trying to express something completely different using words but our unconscious body language will often tell the true story. Of course it is possible to mask these expressions, to learn tricks for putting across sincerity, interest or pleasure which we do not feel. But in the long run the truth will out.

It may be wondered whether all these new facts about hidden language of our bodies have any practical application or whether it is simply gathering knowledge for its own sake. We are still in the very early days of research, but it is already becoming clear that this new knowledge could be of great use in diagnosing and treating some types of mental illness. Schizophrenics, for example, have noticeably different patterns of non-verbal behaviour from other people.

One of the problems of many people, with mild as well as serious mental problems is their failure to communicate with others. Very often something seems to have gone wrong with their non-verbal signaling: it is «out of step», and so relaxed, flowing conversation becomes impossible. By teaching them a few of the «tricks» of body language - how to use their bodies, the gestures and their expressions to help in communication - we can help them to overcome these difficulties.

For the surprising thing is that as people begin consciously to use body language signals, they find that others react to their newfound confidence. This makes conversation and personal contacts easier. By consciously using the gestures which reflect relaxation and confidence, the inadequate communicator actually becomes more confident and relaxed. Such techniques are increasingly being used in group therapy sessions for patients suffering from neurotic and psychotic illness.

Text 4.Read and translate a magazine article about love. Choose the most suitable heading from the list A-Ifor each part(1-7) of the article. There is one extra heading which you do not need to use. There is an example at the beginning (0).